My So Called Cyber Life

Urban myth says that Al Gore is responsible for inventing the Internet. I’m pretty sure that isn’t true. I would guess that a whole team of brainiacs were responsible for developing the worldwide web which is arguably one of the greatest achievements of our time. Not since the invention of the telephone has communication become so easy for people. The Internet has undoubtedly made the world a smaller place and has established a global community.

I was literally the last person in my family to get a computer and an email address. My mother and father were online before I got connected, a fact that is so incongruous with my father’s nature. Dad avoids the telephone at all costs, so to imagine him logging on to email seems completely inconceivable. My late arrival to the cyber world had less to do with avoidance of technology than my own propensity to procrastinate. And, I didn’t really feel I was missing anything by not having Internet access.

In the year 2000 my friend Jackie gave me her old computer when she purchased a new PC. It wasn’t long before I became Bohemedude@aol.com, and my life changed. Suddenly, I had the entire world at my fingertips. I could meet and communicate with people more than half a world away. I could send correspondence to anyone in seconds. I was enthralled. I became adept at instant messaging, and I made the first of my “cyber friends.” Benjamin is a young man who lives in Wyoming. We met online in some crazy chatroom. We discovered we had many things in common, and we began to forge a friendship that has lasted for more than 7 years now.

Since those early days of exploring the web, both my own experiences with the online world and the web itself have expanded and flourished. I’ve become a master at online research thanks to search engines like Google and Ask Jeeves. I have three email addresses: one for personal use, one for my writing, and one for work. I have profiles on MySpace, Friendster, Facebook, and Classmates.com. I have developed a slight addiction to Ebay and Amazon, and my iPod and iTunes have become my new best friends. I write a couple of different blogs, and I read the blogs of several friends on a regular basis. Even my dog, Butch, has his own profile on Dogster.

Sometimes I ponder how the Internet has changed our world, and like anything, there are certainly pros and cons. Opponents of the web complain that it has given us unlimited access to information that may be harmful or put to ill use. Educators and parents complain that children spend too much time surfing the web and not enough time reading or studying. Many arguments against the Internet focus on the number of websites that feature adult material including pornography. And of course, there has been widespread media coverage of predators who use the Internet to target unsuspecting youth.

Despite its apparent downfalls, the Internet has truly enriched my life. I met my partner through an online matchmaking service. Because we met online, we were able to establish a great deal of common ground through emails and chats before we met in person. We knew that we had similar interests and values and had assessed our compatibility before we went on our first date. Some of the guess work of dating had been eliminated. Online dating aside, the web has helped me stay connected with friends and family who live far away. I do not often receive phone calls or “snail mail” from these people, but I do receive email and am thus able to remain a part of their lives. In addition, I have been able to build friendships with people that I would not have otherwise met. Some of these friends are people I have never met face-to-face. Yet, the friendships we share are enlightening and fulfilling.

Due to its ability to connect people in a global sense, the Internet has truly forced us to redefine relationships and communication. As one who loves the written word, I am thrilled that email has truly revitalized correspondence and has brought letter writing, albeit in a new form, back to the forefront of communication practices. When I recently reread Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, I couldn’t help but think about how important letter writing was in that time, and I remembered the emails that my partner and I exchanged during his travel abroad when we were first dating and falling in love. The web has also allowed us to really connect with others on a deeply personal level if we choose to do so. The expansive nature of the worldwide web allows us to establish relationships with those who share our interests and views. For young people living in small towns or anyone else who may feel a sense of isolation, the Internet has opened up doors of acceptance and community that are vital for us all.

I love my cyber life. My partner sometimes complains that I spend too much time “chatting with my peeps.” But for someone like me, who has an insatiable appetite for conversation and the exchange of ideas, the Internet has allowed me to grow. I find that I am often more candid and confident in my online chats with friends than I am in my everyday life. I also have found support and encouragement from others who are able to be a bit more objective about circumstances because they are necessarily removed from my daily life. And although few people probably actually read my blogs or visit my MySpace page or other profiles, I have a sense that I am making my mark on the world. I think that’s a good thing!


www.myspace.com/bohemedude